Well I have am slowly recovering from a drunken stupour courtesey of the kind gift bottle of Bushmills finest safely received via Amtrak from the transported Cornishmans descendant Don Simons.

Don, I must say I am overwelmed at your generosity, I really was jesting when I said you should get on line and send me the bottle you promised years ago.

For the life of me I cannot remember how you came to owe me it, just remind me what that was all about.

Actually Don I am as sober as a Judge, I don't drink strictly teetotal and have not touched the devils brew for over thirty years, however the kind thought is greatly appreciated.

Blame the late great little Gary Dickinson for my sobriety, I went on a Honda trip and shared a room with him in 1973, the booze was free and we consumed so much scotch we were both so ill we were unable to even get back to the car park in Manchester where I had left the wifes Jensen Interceptor.

I phoned and got her to send two lads in the van to pick us up and drive her car back. When we got back we both got the biggest roasting of our lives and I was told in no uncertain terms that the business could manage very well without me and as she had more money in it than me from the sale of her Pharmacies if I ever drank again I was out of both home and business.

She then roasted poor little Gary and despatched him back across the Mersey to Liverpool in the van with one of the lads on pain of death if he returned.

Never touched a drop since, not that I avoid pubs, just had a great night after the Manx with Jim Dunlop and his son's sponsor in the Scenic in the Glens drinking coke however all is not lost I am sure Cargo and the lowlife Devlin could help to dispose of it, so there you are you pair of reprobates an open invitation to come and partake of Don Simon's generosity when you next up by the Causeway.

As well as what did you owe me the bottle for, how did you get my address Don?

Tom, you said once that the ACU was going to be given the ar** from running the TT and I said,
if you are right then I will buy you the biggest bottle of grog I can find.
Always been meaning to drop it in to you but don't get to the other side of the earth that often so
kept putting it off.
I am sure you will have some good friends who will drink it for you but I am not sure if Cargo would
be a good idea he is on a strict health regime for next years Manx.
Your name was in the telephone directory but I must admit I checked with Larry if it was correct
according to the phone number.
Personally I don't know how they can drink whiskey, I drink wine only under doctors orders to
aid the circulation.

Bushmills or any other whiskey always tastes better if it's stolen or free so I think I can make myself available.

Not so sure about Larry at his age whiskey may be too much hot choclate or horlicks may be better.

I read with interest that Don is of Cornish decent.....this requires further investigation..................

I hold the original pasty recipe from the tin mines of Perranuthnoe.

Cargo, Don's ancestors were transported riotous tinbashers from Cornwall, legend has it they were Ned Kelly's tailors and metal bashed his outfit.

I wll keep Don's bottle sealed for you to open and saviour the benefits of his great wealth. The Devlin fella has yet to answer for giving out state secrets

Who . . . . . . . . .ME??

Come on Tom, do you think that a pack of Cornish Methodists would do any tayloring for that Irish horse theif Kelly?