2008 Gorse Lea Marshals’ Late Extra

Joey Dunlop Foundation
Thank you to the Gorse Lea and Cronk Breck spectators who again contributed so generously to the collection buckets, overloading the one enthusiastically shaken to destruction by RR Berrie DSM. The amount raised at this TT came to nearly £500.

Belgian Frank
News of our latest recruit, renamed “Belgian Euro” at Gorse Lea, reached us via the bush telephone exchange (Sector Marshal Fitzgerald). It appears that Frank was partying a little too enthusiastically in Douglas, on the evening following his triumphant Gorse Lea maiden assignment. Emerging from a hostelry, he attempted to swing youthfully around a streetlamp, but the post disobligingly fell over. This attracted the interest of the Constabulary who generously provided him with overnight B&B accommodation. Inevitably there was speculation at the frontier post that Frank/Euro had acted under the illusion that the new 5-star facility at Jurby was already open for business. In the cold light of day it was discovered that the whole row of lamp-posts was dangerously corroded, so Frank/Euro was confirmed innocent and fêted as a champion for alerting the H&S brigade.

Later that day, at the Marshals’ Supper, Frank/Euro was again a guest of the Constabulary when he was invited to join the Chief Constable at the top table.


Stunning News
There was shocking pre-breakfast drama at Aaron House (appointed suppliers of high class gateaux to the Gorse Lea Marshals) on TT Race Wednesday. RR Berrie DSM was studying the previous day’s edition of The Sun, in one of the copious water-closets in the Port St Mary establishment, when he was struck by the idea that a light had just fallen on his head. In fact a heavy, glass light shade had just mysteriously detached itself from its mountings and bounced off Berrie’s bonce. Sabotage is suspected.

RR, confirming the strong resistance of his skull, had recovered sufficiently from his ordeal to declare himself fit for Gorse Lea duties within an hour of the skullduggery. He accepted the predictable comments from the rest of the Gorse Lea Troop without a flicker (probably because he was still feeling light-headed). There were numerous positive questions and one or two earthy ones, but RR was still confused and obviously two-phased to responder.
“Are you still wondering watt hit you when you were doing a little light reading at ohm? You’re looking a little flushed this morning, has your resistance weakened, or are you just down on power? Do you fancy a quick circuit before the roads close? I’ll switch places with you as I want to see if Caroline Cells is in the programme. Are there currents in these buns?”

Welcome to Greeba
TT visitors will have failed to notice the new sign that the Department of Transport erected on the grass verge, adjacent to the Shelter. This is only to be expected because, just days after the beautiful, metal “Welcome to Greeba” sign appeared at knee height, on two metal posts firmly set in concrete, we asked for it to be taken down for the safety of the riders (and the welfare of our shins). The DoT promptly removed the new sign, and fancy new (slip-out) bases were placed in fresh concrete so that, in future, the sign could be slipped in and out of position with ease.

It has only recently been noticed that our team forgot to replace the handsome new sign in its stunning new base units at the end of TT week. This is entirely as a result of a domestic accident in Port St Mary, and we can only apologise to all those disappointed visitors so sadly deprived of the spectacle of the “Welcome to Greeba” sign. There was speculation that the DoT has plans to erect a motorway services sign in its place for next TT, and Euro-friendly lamp-posts are bound to follow. The notice is expected to include symbols depicting all of the facilities and wildlife that can be found at Greeba, and irratepayers will fund it.

Visitors
Thanks to the Department of Transport, the existence of the concealed welcome sign increased the numbers of visitors to Gorse Lea (and the volume of cash in the broken JDF bucket). Charlie Williams, Michael Rutter and other celebrities honoured us with visits to the Shelter. We are also optimistic that Mr Larry Devlin of Bangor (and with an ancestral seat in Castletown) will visit during MGP.

There was prolonged discussion as to whether we should start an autograph board. It was agreed that this would necessitate setting up a small working party to report back late after nearly two years’ delay. Inevitably there would have to be a risk assessment, a planning application (which Phil said would be turned down until we included first-time buyers’ homes in the drawing). This in turn would attract the attention of the nature conservationists, keen to protect the unique Culicoides Impunctatus habitat, and a man from Heritage Homes would turn up frequently to make generous offers for the freehold on the land.

Fuel Crisis
The Team is hopeful that, following this mention in a GLea Report, Mrs Sandra Holland of Ballakilpheric will continue in her highly-valued role (or roll?) as supplier of delicious sandwiches to the Gorse Lea Marshals.

Bug##r Off!
I am pleased to confirm that Gorse Lea Marshals have agreed a Manx Grand Prix contract with an internationally famous cosmetics company (the name should ring a bell) for the supply of bottles of their excellent spray at the bargain price of £2.50 each. You may remember that this product has undergone strict field (and hedge) trials at Gorse Lea and achieved the highest scores under testing conditions (the personnel involved in the trials certainly tick that box). Buy now while stocks last. Make scratching a thing of the past.

Late Footnote (or Headcase?)
There is continued concern for RR Berrie DSM. Claiming that he had not received his MGP marshalling form, he called at the TTMA Office to harass the secretary. He discovered that not only had he received the form but he had already completed and returned it.

Gorse Lea Marshals – Always Up To Scratch.