While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over), I noticed a
cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. The cop pulled me over,
walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry?" I replied, "I'm
late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?" I responded,"I'm a
rectum stretcher." The cop said "What.....a rectum stretcher, and what
does a rectum stretcher do?" I said, "Well, I start with one finger,
then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole
hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly
stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide." The cop asked me, "What the hell do you
do with a 6 foot arsehole?" I simply replied,"You put it on the ACU Commitee"